P-Diddy has "strunth."

Sean Combs. This is a man who believes his own identity can be a statement. Also, his name is a statement: Sean combs. Yes, he does, and he combs well.

Remember when you liked "Puff Daddy"'s music? Were you 12? Me too! Remember when you decided "Puff Daddy" was a ridiculous name? Were you 13? OMG ME TOO! Sadly, Sean Combs was easily into his later 20s before he figured it out. "Puff Daddy?" C'mon. Thank the heavens he went to a more approachable name: P-Diddy.

"Ah yes," says the general consumer, "P-Diddy sounds like something I would enjoy."
"Sir, would you have any idea what a P-Diddy was?" I reply.
"No, but it wouldn't matter."

Damn you, Sean. You've won, again.

This mentality of do-whatever-it'll-be-gold has continued to this day. His recent ad campaign for newly released scent, I Am King, is running on some channel that my sister watches. I end up watching shows such as "Dress Me Cause I Look Like Hell" and "Cook a Meal, and So Help Me If It Sucks..."* Between segments of these fine programs, I ended up seeing his singular I Am King commercial roughly 8 times in a short time-span. Already there's cause for concern. "Mr. Combs? Do you have to beat me over the head with your new fragrance?" I don't even wear cologne, I just wear Axe: Vice and hope for the best**.

Next on my list: "Strunth."

What the hell. Strunth, or strinth***, is Diddy's newfound attribute I would assume closely resembles strength. But, then again, it might not be that at all. I do understand that there are dialects and accents and variations of language, but I'm trying to understand D-Poopy's use of his. Refer back to the age you thought Diddy was the bee's knees. 12 years old, right? Are you ridiculously non"street"? I am. Do you say "strength?" I do. P-Doolittle's music, to my knowledge, is music for middle-class, non-urban middle-schoolers.

Living in NYC, I get the privilege of hearing other peoples music played over a speaker in the subway. Most of the time, the music is some sort of hardcore hip-hop/rap by someone who carries a 'thug'like aura. I have yet to hear, nor can I imagine, this scary-looking individual blasting out "Been Around The World." "Strunth" gets you, and us (especially) no where. It was a voice-over, so I know he could focus on EXACTLY how he wanted to sound. Lord knows, he already looked about as REALISTICALLY AWESOME as he could be.

Tux on a jetski....I want to smell like HIM!

* I actually don't mind them, and even like them sometimes. Do girls like me yet?
** Best - My pits don't smell like a racoon dropped a slimy duce.
*** Phonetically, I believe the English language doesn't have the proper letters to portray the correct spelling.